July 31st

So, court today did not provide the intended resolution we had hoped for. We are actually rescheduled AGAIN for July 31st.

Ah, the lovely court system.

We began this morning dropping the youngest little ones in their various places. Miss A was shuttled to tennis camp, Little Guy went to a friend's house for some much-needed "guy time", and the twins went with one of our close teacher friends. Big Sister came with us to court, on the chance that she would get the opportunity to speak with the judge. The lawyer visited yesterday, and assured us that she would be kept in another room, and the judge would go to her, so she would be able to avoid the witness stand in front of everyone involved.

We arrived and got to our court room. There were three short cases heard before us that needed quick decisions, and then were over. Around 9:30, it was time for our kids' case to be heard.

The morning had been otherwise cleared for the judge to focus his attention on this case, but there were twelve witnesses, almost every single one for the biological family as character witnesses and such. I was asked to speak on behalf of the twins' and Big Sister's current statuses. In these serious cases, they make the witnesses leave the court room until their turn on the stand, so no collusion or influencing happens, apparently. I spent almost all morning in the hallway waiting to go on the stand (eating Twizzlers and Pinteresting/Facebooking from my phone... :-))

Before the witnesses were dismissed, the judge spoke for a while. He explained that this was becoming a long, drawn-out process (uh, yes!), and requested everyone to be brief and factual. He told us he was cutting off the case at noon. He made the point several times that this was incredibly hard, because in either leaving the kids where they are currently or returning them, they would not be together as a whole, 5-sibling group. In the midst of our introductions, lawyers two new family members came forward - some grandparents and an aunt - who are wanting custody of the group.

I have written many times before about how bad we feel that we couldn't take in all five of the siblings and provide them a home together. I have seen how the kids, even at their young ages, yearn for each other, ask for each other, get excited when they see each other. It was a bit of a surprise to hear about the new family members coming in to the picture, and to hear their home studies be requested as a potential to move the kids there. However, we cannot fault the logic, and would rejoice if a positive solution could be found to keep all of the kids together.

So, my thought was, with the way he was talking to everyone, that the judge was probably going to throw out the case of the cousins who want the twins and their two young siblings back, but order the Department to expedite home studies on the other family members and get all five kids there as soon as possible. That was my prediction.

My Twizzlers and I waited in the hallway and were called after a little more than a hour. I hadn't known I would officially go up to a witness stand, on a podium, with a big chair, and a microphone, right next to the court recorder, and everything. Talk about legit witnessing! I whispered to the court reporter as I sat down, "Wow, this is intense!"

I was asked some basic questions about the twins' progress at our home since their placement. I spoke of how they both came in with slight developmental delays and were receiving various therapy services, but within two or three months had been deemed ineligible for more therapy due to their great progress. I spoke of how they both had nightmares several times a night for the first two months, and how then we were able to work through that. I was asked about Big Sister, if I felt she was "normal" (I answered, "Are any of us really normal?" before speaking out how she needs lots of love and attention right now, but has such great potential if she can focus on achieving her dreams and staying on target.) I was asked if I thought she was a liar, which I truthfully answered, "No."

Then the family's lawyer began questioning me. She asked if the department had told me we would adopt the twins if/after the family loses their rights. I answered, "We are a foster-adopt home. We take in kids that need to be fostered, knowing there is legal risk, and agreeing that, if needed and agreed upon by all parties if the parents' rights are terminated, that we are the next logical place to look for a permanent home." She told me I didn't answer her question, and pretty heatedly repeated, "Did the department tell you that you would adopt the twins if the family loses their rights?" So I repeated, "We are a foster-adopt home. We take in kids that need to be fostered, knowing there is legal risk, and agreeing that, if needed and agreed upon by all parties if the parents' rights are terminated, that we are the next logical place to look for a permanent home." (Yes, original. I was feeling a little... facetious.) She was pretty heated at that point, and said, "It's a simple yes or no answer. Did the Department tell you that?" At that point, I glanced at the caseworker, and she stood up and said, "Objection, your honor. She's answering the question just fine." And the judge said, "Yes, she did. Move on." (Yay.)

We rested. So, that was the end of my time in the chair.

(Big Sister ended up not being seen by the judge. The girl did play many games of monopoly with a court worker who was in the sequestering room to supervise her, though.)

After one more witness, heard over the phone, the judge announced that it was near noon and he needed to close this up, but wasn't ready to rule. He specifically wanted to see for himself the actual affidavit given by the children when the issues were first reported, to see the exact allegations as well as the exact wording given by Big Sister and three other older siblings in the other home. So, he rescheduled for us for first thing on Thursday, July 31st.

One thing to be thankful for is that this judge is taking the decision very seriously. That is definitely a positive. However, this case has been opened since 2011, when the kids were first removed from their biological mother, and the cousins who were their previous home have been being investigated since last summer, a whole year. There is a sense that there has been plenty of time to hear all of the evidence and to be able to make a clear-headed decision, and the only ones being hurt are the children from not having the stability of one permanent home.

So, that's where we stand today. We will reconvene on July 31st, and hopefully have a final answer THEN.

Big Sister seemed to keep all of the news in stride, although she said it would not be a good situation to be placed with the grandparents in the picture, as they were the twins' grandparents and not hers, and she felt they enabled the poor behavior of their son (not her father). But, we'll just see what the judge orders.

We're not upset about the other potential family members coming into the picture. In the end, this isn't about feeling defensive or possessive about the kids and where they end up. We are here to support them (as easy and as hard as that sounds) and to make sure they have the best situation for the future. If we were a landing zone for them to get some stability before moving on to another family member, then we played our role as best as we could. We know the courts want to keep families together as much as possible, and we respect that.

We'll just keep praying and trusting in the things God is doing in OUR family.

Thanks again, y'all...